The other day, I was approached with a question that caught me off guard: “What relationship advice would you give me?” It came from a young adult who seemed to be reveling in the honeymoon phase of their relationship. At first, I couldn’t help but wonder, who am I to dispense relationship advice? Yet, with the realization that I’ve been presumed to be “happily” married for quite some time, I couldn’t shake the feeling that maybe, just maybe, I had something valuable to share.

Despite my initial hesitation, I knew that the advice I offered could potentially shape this individual’s perspective on relationships. This weighed heavily on me, as I understood the gravity of the responsibility I held at that moment. I was determined not to fall back on the generic advice that’s often parroted – the “communication is key” mantra. Instead, I wanted to offer genuine insights derived from my own experiences, lessons I wish I had learned earlier in my own journey.

So I asked the individual to please consider my advice and perspective

Embrace Self-Discovery

I firmly believe that understanding oneself is foundational to any successful relationship. Reflecting on my own experience, I recall a time when my life partner and I were so enmeshed in each other’s lives that we lost sight of our individual identities. We were consumed by the euphoria of love, oblivious to the importance of nurturing our own sense of self. However, as the initial fervor subsided, we confronted the sobering reality of co-dependency. It was amidst this melting pot of introspection that we gleaned a profound truth: to truly love another, one must first love oneself.

Advice: I implore you to embrace the journey of self-discovery with unwavering resolve. Cast aside the shackles of external pressures and expectations and delve into the depths of your being. Take the time to unravel the layers of your personality, exploring your likes, dislikes, passions, and aspirations. Allow yourself the freedom to experiment, to stumble, and to grow. For in understanding oneself lies the foundation for authentic connection and mutual growth within a relationship.

Furthermore, it’s crucial to understand that self-discovery isn’t a fixed endpoint but rather an ongoing voyage. Just as the tides constantly shift, so does our understanding of ourselves evolve with time. Embrace the journey with a spirit of curiosity and openness, knowing that each twist and turn offers new insights and revelations. Remember, the true beauty of self-discovery lies not in reaching a destination, but in the endless exploration of the infinite depths of your soul.

Define Your Own Way of Living

Growing up, we are often shaped by societal norms, cultural expectations, and familial influences. However, I’ve learned that blindly conforming to these standards can stifle personal growth and authenticity.

Throughout my journey, I’ve encountered pivotal moments where I challenged the status quo – constantly and embraced my true beliefs, even in the face of criticism. In the midst of this tumultuous dissent, I discovered the courage to forge my own path.

Advice: I urge you to define your own path and as true liberation lies not in the embrace of societal expectations, but in the courageous pursuit of one’s own truth.

PLEASE, embrace your quirks, celebrate your eccentricities, and revel in the kaleidoscope of your uniqueness. Do not be swayed by the siren call of societal pressures, but rather stand steadfast in the sanctuary of your authenticity.

This is important!!!!

Recognize that the path to self-discovery is fraught with challenges and tribulations. There will be moments of doubt, of uncertainty, and of fear. Yet, it is amidst these crucibles of adversity that the flames of authenticity burn brightest.

I dare you to summon the courage to challenge the status quo, to defy the expectations of others, and to carve out a path uniquely your own. For in doing so, you honor not only yourself but also the timeless wisdom of authenticity.

Prioritize Your Relationship (with Advice)

In a world filled with outside influences, it’s essential to remember that your relationship belongs to you and your partner alone. While seeking advice from trusted sources can be valuable, oversharing can sometimes do more harm than good.

Reflecting on my own journey, I recall moments when the noise of outside voices threatened to drown out the whispers exchanged between my life partner and me. We found strength in setting our own boundaries and roles within our relationship, allowing us to grow together in a way that felt authentic to us.

Furthermore, I wholeheartedly advocate for supporting your partner in their journey to self-improvement. Never allow them to compromise their dreams for the sake of the relationship. You both have a single life to live, and it’s imperative to live it to the fullest. Encourage each other’s personal growth and self-discovery. Remember, in a healthy relationship, both partners uplift and inspire each other, fostering an atmosphere conducive to individual fulfillment and mutual happiness.

Avoid Rushing Into Marriage (with Advice)

Lastly, I offer a word of caution based on my own experience: don’t rush into marriage, especially at an immature age. While I don’t regret my decision to marry, I recognize now that I could have benefited from more time for self-discovery. Marriage is a lifelong commitment that requires a strong sense of self and clarity of purpose.

Marriage is not merely a union of hearts, but a legal commitment woven from the threads of self-awareness and purpose. I advocate for a more holistic approach to readiness for marriage—one that transcends mere chronological age. It is not merely a matter of counting the years, but of cultivating the virtues of self-awareness and emotional maturity.

In wrapping up, I’d like to emphasize that navigating relationships demands a profound self-awareness and a dedication to authenticity. By embarking on the journey of self-discovery, forging your own path, and placing your relationship at the forefront amidst external pressures, you lay the groundwork for a meaningful and lasting partnership. Always remember, your journey is distinct, and there’s no universal formula for relationships. Trust your instincts, foster transparent communication with your partner, and most importantly, treasure the voyage of growth and exploration together.